Gaslighting in Relationship/Marriage
I recently made a TikTok video for my page on Gaslighting in relationship/marriage, but took an alternate spin on this topic.
As you know, gaslighting is a buzzword that is frequented by many to describe an act of selfishness in conflict and communication among those in intimate relationships. Gaslighting, however, is not limited to romantic relationships and can happen in any type of relationship, though we most commonly hear about it when discussing toxicity and abuse.
Gaslighting is a form of abuse, but if we were to take it at face value, meaning interpret based on whats out there in social media and even in the therapy world nowadays, we go to the extreme - breakup, divorce, or at least get your partner to stop the behavior and understand how abusive it is.
I want to call something out to you here - and that is - the underlying meaning behind gaslighting. Why would my partner do this to me? Why would they be selfish and why would they seek to hurt me in this way, by not listening, acknowledging my experience, honoring what I’m coming to them with.
I want you to know how common gaslighting is, and that it does indeed occur in the healthiest of relationships on occasion.
There are distinct reasons for gaslighting, but it can be hard to see this when you are in the middle of a conflict, feeling hurt and alone. On the other end of things, you are partner is often feeling just as hurt and alone - that they had part in you feeling the way you do.